Work-life balance is one of those phrases everyone talks about – yet few describe in a way that feels real or practical to me.
Often the conversation starts with hours: how many you sleep, how many you work, how many you should have left over if life were “balanced.” But if that’s the definition, my calendar wouldn’t qualify. My schedule is clearly not 9 to 5.
I sleep about six and a half to seven hours a night (and Whoop tells me that I have a solid recovery), and each week I work nearly 73 hours or more, plus another 13 to 15 hours of study (you can do the math). And yet, I feel balanced. Not because I have fewer demands, but because I’m intentional about the ones that matter most to me.
The Four Pillars That Anchor My Life
Over time, I’ve oriented my life around four pillars that guide my choices:
Health.
Family.
Personal Growth.
Work.
Each day, I make sure my time supports these pillars – and I remove everything that doesn’t. This framework has become far more powerful than any generic definition of balance.
Health
It’s no secret that sleep and physical wellbeing affect our energy, focus, and decision-making. Research from Harvard shows that insufficient sleep isn’t just tiring, it hurts performance, mood, and cognitive function, and can even impact long-term health.
I protect my sleep and I work out two to three times a week. Not as a box-ticking exercise, but as an investment in my resilience: physical, emotional, and mental.
Family
The most important parts of my day aren’t on the hotel calendar.
Mornings belong to my daughter.
We have breakfast together. We talk. I bring her to school. That time is not a routine, it’s a daily moment of presence before the world demands anything from me.
Evenings end the same way.
Putting her to bed is important. We read, we talk, we slow the day down. These rituals aren’t glamorous, but they are what keep me grounded and recharge me.
When I’m with my family, I try to be with my family, not half distracted, not multitasking, not half present on a phone (my daughter is sure to tell me each time I slip). That presence matters deeply.
Personal Growth
Alongside my role, I’m pursuing a doctoral degree. I usually study about one hour on weekday evenings and about four hours per day on weekends.
Some might assume this would deplete energy. For me, it recharges it.
Learning keeps my thinking fresh. It reminds me that leadership isn’t just managing what’s in front of you, it’s developing the capacity to lead into the future. For me, growth isn’t something you cram in after work, it’s something that sustains how you work.
Work
The reality is that work for me is intense. The hotel business is 24/7, people-centric, and often unpredictable.
On weekdays, I’m at the hotel early and leave late enough to be present for evening events and dinner service. On weekends, I work about 4 hours or more each day, often squeezing it around family commitments, study blocks, and in-between moments.
When I work, I work with full focus. I also often use in-between moments and waiting times, not just to be busy, but to be intentional. It’s not about packing more hours; it’s about making them count.
The Power of Subtraction – Not Addition
Maybe the most underrated part of balance is not what you add, but what you remove. Peter Drucker wrote that time is the scarcest resource, and unless it is managed, nothing else can be managed. In The Effective Executive, he doesn’t begin with strategy or leadership style. He begins with time, specifically, with understanding where it actually goes.
I don’t scroll mindlessly on my phone.
I don’t default to background TV, and unless it’s a movie with my wife, I don’t watch at all.
I don’t let social media fill in my gaps.
Everything outside the four pillars is optional.
Weekends As Ritual, Not Downtime
Weekends aren’t off – they’re different.
My wife and I have an extended breakfast together every weekend. No agenda. No interruptions. No to-do lists. It’s sacred. It marks the transition from the week’s pace to a different rhythm, one of connection, conversation, and presence.
These rituals may seem small, but they anchor the week.
My Definition of Balance
Work–life balance isn’t a scale where hours on one side must equal hours on the other.
It’s about:
Protecting rituals that ground me
Managing energy instead of just time
Being fully present where it matters
And removing what distracts
From the outside, this life can look intense.
From the inside, it feels sustainable, because it’s rooted in what actually matters.
To be clear, this isn’t a prescription. It’s one lived perspective.
